Acceptance: A Time to Heal and Live Well

For most people, acceptance of hurt takes time, and most often a lot of hard work.

 by Michael Corthell

Healing oneself requires faith, time and acknowledgement of certain truths.

Let's look at 'time'.

Time heals all wounds, correct? Is there any truth at all to that statement?

No matter how much time passes by, the effects of a wounded heart will still remain. The insult may no longer be felt acutely, but it's still there. In time, you'll only feel the tightness of the scar tissue but that scaring is your reminder that, while time does indeed, heal all wounds, our minds never forget.

''Acceptance doesn't mean resignation; it means understanding that
something is what it is and that there's got to be a way through it.''
—Michael J. Fox

So, let's talk about acceptance again. Like the quote above, maybe acceptance is acknowledgement of reality with the goal of dealing with it by the best means possible. Time heals worry in much the same way. Accept the worst and then try to make the worst outcome a better one.

Another quote to illustrate what the passage of time does to pain and suffering comes not from a philosopher but from a comic artist:

''Tragedy plus time equals comedy.''

—Steve Allen

There is much truth to that statement. In most cases it perfectly encapsulates, ''Time Heals All Wounds(of the heart)''

Emotional pain often is felt much, much more than physical pain. I think we can all agree on that point, and we should also know and understand that psychic pain can have a great impact on our quality of life as well. It further needs to be remembered that the stress and negative emotions associated with any psychological trauma, can also lead directly to actual physical pain and illness.

Let's look at some coping skills:

REJECTION, Let it go! Rejection stimulates the same pathways in your brain that actual physical pain does, that's why it hurts so much. The feeling of rejection interferes with your ability to think, remembering and make decisions. Let it go, because you are just as valuable and valued to the Universe, as the one who hurt you.

Brooding, Stop now! When you go over and over a hurt in all it's gory details, the memories you replay in your head become enhanced and even sharper, which in turn causes more anger. Plus there are no new insights. Instead reflect briefly on a painful event and trying to find understanding or closure. Over thinking increases your stress and with some people it can actually be addictive.

Flip that negative to a positive(always!) DO NOT let yourself feel helpless after a hurt, or blame it on your lack of ability or bad luck or anything else—your self-esteem is too important. You can however, understand and accept that specific factors are within your control, and then focus on ways you can improve yourself.

Use your guilt wisely. Guilt can be a positive emotion, in that it may stop you from doing something that is harmful to yourself and another person. It also can be very damaging, so the 'dosing' is important, because guilt that hangs on too long or is over the top, can very much limit your ability to focus on your work and enjoy life. (Still feeling guilty after apologizing for a wrongdoing? Try very hard to express empathy toward the person and show that you understand how what you did affected them. This will most often lead to genuine forgiveness and lessening or elimination your guilty feelings.)

Guard against negative self-image. Positive affirmations are excellent tools for the betterment of your health—mental, physical and spiritual. Some examples of positive, self-affirmations, such as ''Today, I am full of energy and overflowing with joy.'' and ''My body is healthy; my mind is sound and my soul is peaceful.'' These affirmatives can help you reinforce your positive qualities.

Therefore, time DOES NOT heal all wounds. Not in and of itself at least. True healing requires Faith in God, and a consciousness and constant effort —every single day.

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When Time Doesn't Heal (Completely)

by Dr. Robert K. Ross

How is evil and suffering perpetuated?

Robert K. Ross, MD, President and CEO of The California Endowment, gives a compelling overview of the role that exposure to childhood trauma plays in the lives of troubled and chronically ill Americans. I highly recommend the following lecture, because it explains quite a lot regarding the problems we have today, not only in America, but indeed the entire World.