Money and Relationships

''When its a question of money, everybody is of the same religion.''
by Mike Corthell

A common misconception is that you shouldn't talk about money with your partner because it only leads to fights, but the truth is that you can't have a great relationship until you can communicate and agree about money.

''Money cannot buy true love, but fighting about it will truly bankrupt your relationship.''

Sometimes the best area of communication in a marriage is about money, sometimes not. Fighting about money and how to spend it are common. How those disagreements are handled can and do determine the direction and quality of the relationship.

How do we handle this part of marriage, friendship and life? Like anything else, we practice we work at it!

So, let's agree that disagreements about money is a normal part of life and that money can make people funny(odd funny mot ha ha funny).

The first thing: Woman and men are different. (Really??) Generally women see money as a security issue. They, for example will lean toward having a 'rainy-day' fund. They tend to value security highly, so the idea of running out of money can be very stressful.

Men, again generally speaking, take more risks with money and don't save for emergencies. Men may use money to buy status and can struggle with self-esteem when money is tight.

Both men and women can be impulse buyers and may not understand the difference between needs and wants.

Who should handle the money? Yes, only one of you should be the money handler the one who is the most skilled. But the controller of the money absolutely needs the input of the other on how it is spent.

Be honest about how you feel about money. Money envy and jealousy over it can ruin your relationship. Have honest talks about it.  You have to acknowledge your feelings so that you don't fall into resentment. If you are jealous of your partners ability to generate cash and try to pretend that everything is okay, there is trouble a head. Talk about it kids!